Thursday, April 30, 2015

The Porn Problem

Many Americans wonder how a person can come to a point where they rape another human being.  One of the key issues lies in the objectification of women.  It is absolutely noted that boys and men are raped (a topic for another post).  When females are seen as less than males or as non persons (this may take the form of I don't know you so I can see you as someone's wife, daughter, sister, etc.), it becomes possible to commit atrocities toward them.  Pornography is the embodiment (pun intended) of female objectification and degradation.  Sexual sin thrives on secrecy and unrestrained natural urges.  It is not only wrong in and of itself, but is like a gateway drug into more and more debauchery.

Because they are visual beings, males are drawn to pictures of female bodies like a moth to a flame.  The male "group think" in our society is that "all men do it," as if to say viewing pornography is acceptable or a right of passage.  Pornography is emotional, physical and spiritual death.  It perpetuates lies about who females were created to be.  It keeps men from bonding with and performing for their wives sexually.  It is a nasty secret that enslaves evangelists.

 Because our culture is so sexually obsessed, music and media messages lure boys and men into this deadly trap.  The commercials such as Hardees have desensitized a nation of people into accepting the sexual degradation of females and bound males to chains they don't know how to break free of if they desire to.

Cancer Below The Belt

You are never prepared to hear that you have cancer, even if you may suspect it.  Despite many years of menstrual irregularities and pain that date back to my adolescence, I went for regular checkups with no indication of a serious problem or need to run any tests or perform any procedures.  Then, fertility became an issue and the miscarriage of one child.  This was all handled as a "normal" course of events until I was told four months ago that I was entering into uterine cancer.  Suddenly, it became a crisis.  My uterus and tubes were yanked through my abdomen and I was then, again, told to be about my merry way.  Until, I developed a life-threatening blood clot in my groin that extended the entire length of my leg.  I was rushed (after seven hours in the emergency room) to a hospital bed so that the hospitalist could "watch me closely."  I found that quite ironic as I was hooked to no monitoring devices whatsoever and turned out promptly the next morning.  Now I'm considered "recovered" because the swelling and pain in my leg have decreased.  There is nothing about my mental state that has recovered from my frustration of this travesty of gynecological care that is happening in our country.  How did I get to this place of ending my child-bearing years and left with grief and the passion to make change that is going unrecognized in the medical community?  I trust the Spirit of the Great Physician to guide a multiple layer of recovery I need and the wisdom to know how I can be a part of helping prevent other women from suffering in the same way.

Women in Professional Baseball

It's baseball season!  This is one of my favorite times of the year since I am a rabid fan of the game.  Last year, I fought serious discrimination when I chose to coach a boys' Little League Baseball team to experience a hobby (we both love) with my son.  I was an outstanding coach, but I was undermined from the start when I was given a roster of the youngest, most inexperienced players.  The one little girl who signed up and paid her $100 dollars to play was so intimidated by the gender bias she quit baseball all together and lost her money.  This was followed by the men who were my assistants holding runners at third base to throw the games or laying against the outfield fence to avoid helping the fielders. They made demeaning remarks to the boys about how they were "playing like girls" and would not support my efforts to discipline the kids when they showed me disrespect. I was in no way trying to be a man or to detract from what these fathers were teaching their sons about baseball.  However, the lesson I learned was that many men feel threatened in their manhood by a woman who can perform a traditionally male skill better than they can.  The result is that they will use any means necessary to force out the threat.  I hope that through my emotional strength, I taught my boys a lesson that means much more than the game, that women deserve respect for who they are.
Many of the greatest professional baseball players of all time were women.  However, most of us have never heard of them because of the male agenda to keep them quiet.  I proudly give you some of their names.  Helene Britton-owned the St. Louis Cardinals from 1911-16.  Lizzie Murphy was the first person to play for both the American League and the National League in all-star games.  Sophie Kurys holds the record for the most stolen bases (1946).  Jackie Mitchell struck out Babe Ruth and Lou Gehrig only to learn her contract was immediately cancelled.  Did you know "Take Me Out to the Ballgame" was written about a female baseball player's love for the game?  Many lyrics have been deleted from the song we now sing.

At the end of the season, I bought each boy a trophy and publicly acknowledged his unique ability as a player.  To my knowledge, none of the male-led teams received anything unless they won the tournament.  My most special moment came when a father of one of my players told me how wonderful it was that I made his son feel so special.  That, in turn, helped me know that I did the right thing by toughing out the season and there were men out there who appreciated me just as I am.  That's what it takes to be on the same team.

Wednesday, April 29, 2015

Stand Up and Pee To Be Counted

If they will admit it, most women resent not being able to stand up to pee.  The very nature of the societal norm for women to lower herself to a toilet, or if she's lucky enough to be in company who isn't embarrassed by her "copping a squat," is sexist.  There is no reason a man couldn't sit down to urinate.  Once again, to have a penis, means to have power, even in our modern society, or maybe especially in our modern society.  The infrastructure around us supports this distorted idea.  Why do men need their own special toilets (urinals) that are not found in womens' restrooms?  I remember feeling so dejected as a kid because I had to use the uncool, generic bathroom.
I am against public urination, but I am even more offended when boys or men pee in front of girls or women who don't feel like they can pee right alongside them.  It feels as if some guys do it because the female is present.  Some boys or men use potty humor to publicly shame females.  There is nothing worse than to be laughed at if you're already feeling less than.
Females encounter many obstacles with just trying to relieve themselves.  Most men don't realize that public restrooms for women are much worse than what they encounter.  I have stood in line for an hour.  I have gone into stalls where someone has apparently been afraid to even hover and peed a lake right onto the floor, visited a toilet that had menstrual blood slung across the seat, and come eyes-to-breasts (while changing clothes) with a pre-teen boy whose mother found it acceptable to allow him to use the lady's room.  I have gotten a rash from getting too far in the weeds so cars couldn't see everything I've got.  For all these reasons and I'm sure more if I thought more about it, I am an avid supporter and user of a Female Urinary Device.
My FUD allows me to unzip, pee through my fly, and avoid all of the aforementioned obstacles all the while gaining a new sense of freedom and self-respect.  In my research, I have learned that some women prefer the all naturale route of spreading their labia and peeing through their fly in very much the same way as a male would.  And, I am delighted that some women have even determined that because of their shorter urethras, they can pee much further than most men-you know that distance contest we were always jealous of as kids, ladies?
The bottom line is that all of the jokes and debasing of girls and women because they have different anatomy is cruel and wrong.  And, it needs to stop.  So, girls and ladies, stand up and pee if you want to.  It'll make you feel better; I promise.

What Dads Can Do

The first thing that dads can do to truly love their baby girls is to get excited when they hear "it's a girl!"      A female child is a gift from God, and remember men, you are being entrusted to fulfill a purpose as a father of this precious one.  That is an awesome calling, to be the father of a little girl, because you will be her hero.  The way you can lead is as the Spiritual leader of the family.  Speak life.  Show respect for her mother through kind and loving words and actions that demonstrate your wife is special and an equal partner in life and love.  Buy Mom flowers, offer a shoulder for her to cry on when she's hurting, support her hobbies and honor her with affirming words.  Listen to her ideas and compliment her often and publicly.  Defend her honor, because her femininity is under attack, and lead her even as Christ gave up His life for the Church.  Grant Mom the same respect you would want from her.  See her emotional and sensitive design as a treasure, because she can teach you just as you can teach her, how to be more like God's image that you complete together.

Once your daughter sees that her mother has your respect because of her feminine design and because of who she is as a person, it will only naturally follow that your little girl will see herself as worthy of respect and unselfish love.  While your wife is Queen, your daughter must be the princess.  Please note that not all princesses are the same either.  Some like an occasional romp through a mud puddle or to hit a home run.  Much of the strength of an emotionally stable woman comes from the validation she receives from her father as a young child.  She becomes able to choose a man who gives her full honor when her father has confirmed for her from The Beginning, that she is enough, just because of who she is.  You should come into her world with her guidance, share with her in her interests, even if that means tea parties and tiaras.  Most importantly, you should allow her to come into your world.  One of the negative reinforcers of women feeling not as good as a man stems from feeling she is on the outside of a special club that she cannot enter into because she is not innately an equal of a man.  Take her fishing if that's what you're into, or teach her how to kick a football.  Her future husband will thank you for it and she will be so grateful to be on your team.

Dads, don't be embarrassed to talk to your daughters about their bodies, alongside or even apart from their mothers.  With age-appropriate education comes much empowerment for her.  Read to her about women of the Bible and the qualities they possessed that led God to seek them out.  Watch movies with her that show females as the heroine of the story.  Introduce her to women who have invented things, changed the world, and let her know you believe in her too.  Discourage boys and other men from using language or viewing images that are degrading to women, and do NOT do these things yourself.  Do not allow society through Satan's influence to tell you that to build yourself up as a man you have to tear a woman down.  That is a lie, and you must know that you are more valuable than that as well.

Her Vagina Is Enough

From the time they are in their mothers' wombs, little girls are defined by their lack of a penis.  You may have seen an ultrasound where the penis of a male child has been circled with a bright red marker, shown off proudly to inquiring friends and family members by parents everywhere.  Little girls carry this message with them like a millstone around their necks from the time they are old enough to think about how to define themselves as a human being.  The foundation they build from is that they are lacking, they are not enough in their very design, nor can they ever be.  Many girls feel betrayed by their source of existence, their God.

It is not uncommon to see a little boy publicly masturbate or stop playing outside just long enough to pee on a nearby tree.  Parents laugh it off as "boys will be boys."  But, when a little girl attempts to touch herself or, Heaven forbid, lower her panties to urinate outdoors, these same parents are completely mortified and look to punish the girl.  I have seen so many little girls wince in pain or walk around shamefully with urine-soaked shorts because their parents forced them to hold it until they got to an "appropriate" restroom facility.  The message this sends is that girls do not have the same rights as boys and are not capable enough to even complete a basic bodily function without getting grief for it. It also results in some nasty urinary tract infections.   Oh, and the little girls who attempt the freedom of standing to pee, if their parents were anything like mine, got the beating of their life (by the way, by my mother).  While my brothers stood next to my father on the bank of the fishing pond relieving themselves, I stood watching, awaiting the explosion of my bladder.  

Many good guys secretly, or not so secretly, hope for a male child when they become fathers.  Little girls  might as well be aliens, because while we teach our girls not to learn about or discuss their female genitalia, grown men know even less about them.  They fear changing diapers because someone might accuse them of molesting their own daughter.  They don't want to be seen playing dress-up, because after all, doing anything "like a girl" is just about the worst put-down any man can receive.  Once again, little girls receive the message very early on in life that they are not as good as a male child, and some feel downright unwanted.  Some are openly told a male child was preferred over them.  Friends, we are killing the spirits of our little girls, and these messages we send to them damage females at a soul-level and keep males in bondage to the lies of Satan.  This puts their souls in jeopardy as well.

From the beginning, none of this was so.  The Truth is that God made woman as an image-bearer of Himself just as important and special to Him as was Adam, only displaying different and unique traits of Himself.  Our problems with gender equality really began in The Beginning, when Eve was striving to be more by plucking that apple, flaunting it over Adam, and in turn causing him to well up inside himself the desire to conquer Eve.  Satan loves nothing more than to see the demise of Eve, the beautiful, finishing touch of God's Creation.  Out of these lies, women and men join as co-conspirators with Satan and turn from their life-giving partnership to behaviors that stink of death.  It is from this basic belief, that a little girl's genitalia is not good enough, that pandemics such as pornography have been created.